After my first engagement was called off, I moped, cried, stared into space, cried again, and basically did everything anyone with a broken heart would do. After several weeks of the same routine, a friend told me, “You have to eventually snap out that phase! You have to make that decision to move on.” Although it took some time, I eventually did make that choice to snap out of it and move on.
As I go through another process of piecing my heart back together, praying fervently to God to heal me and help me learn to forgive, the Lord has been reminding me of the invalid man in John 5:1-9. This man who, for thirty-eight years had been living with his illness, did not once ask for help to get into the pool of Bethesda. And when Jesus asked him if he wanted to get well, his response was more of an excuse rather than an enthusiastic affirmative.
“Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, and while I am going another steps down before me.
Jennifer Rothschild goes direct to the heart of the matter in saying:
The man at the pool gave an explanation for his situation rather than an answer to Jesus. He blamed others for why he was the way he was. Instead of just saying “Yes, Lord, I want to be well” he felt the need to say, “But Lord, this is why I am not well.”
We do the same thing.
To be well means I lean on Jesus instead of my old coping mechanisms.
Now, I’m not talking about true diseases like the Retinitis Pigmentosa that caused my blindness. I’m talking about the more serious disease that has nothing to do with blindness — the diseases of self-pity, anger, or resentment that can deeply debilitate me.
Sometimes we actually prefer our pain. We are so used to our weakness, our addiction, or our sin that we don’t really want to be well. We want an excuse to be who we are — stuck in our own weakness — paralyzed by our circumstances.
We sometimes find it difficult to shake off our bitterness, anger, resentment. self-pity and depression, but all we really need to do is make that choice, stand up and head straight to the arms of Jesus.
Read Jennifer’s entire blog at Jennifer Rothschild – What It Means To Be Well